November 10, 2004

Out with the Old, In with the even Older

I went through my maternity clothes yesterday and packed up most of mine and returning the borrowed things. It is some what exciting to pull out all my old favorite t-shirts and jeans, a few of which I can already wear and most of which will fit fairly soon. I even wore my regular overalls yesterday, until a tidal wave of baby spit-up washed over the front of them.

Packing the clothes up is also a sad thing though. The vain part of me will miss them, because my maternity clothes are always more fashionable and stylish than the things I generally wear. Really though, I generally hate admitting that my pregnancy is really over. As much as I wanted it to be over and as much as I adore watching the teeny little thing that used to be inside, I miss the comforting feeling of little wriggles and kicks. I miss the quiet and the sleep too, of course. Plus, this was my third and possibly last baby.

I might just be packing these clothes up until some later date when I just give them all away never to be worn by me again. I'm certainly not ready to commit to a fourth child and I spent a lot of my pregancy thinking there was no way I could ever do this again, but I'll miss all those clothes if I never wear them again. I'll miss the wriggles and kicks. I'll look at the kidlets I have and wonder, "What if..."

Therefore, right now the clothes will lie dormant under my bed. In a few years I will pull them out and ship them off to Goodwill or wear them one more time. If the latter, I'll know it will be my last chance to wear them and in the end they'll be headed for Goodwill anyway. But for now, good-bye to them. I need to go figure out which regular pants will fit.

Comments

Jordana, you made me smile with delight as I read your reflections about those special clothes. When you described in such a sweet and tender way the missing of the wriggling and kicking, I couldn't help but impishly hope that you might be pregnant again. ;)

Posted by: Roberta at November 10, 2004 10:28 AM

That wistful feeling takes a while to ebb, I think. I know even after four, and with the youngest now being seven, and with birthday 45 coming in only two months, Reba still gets those pangs. I think if we could have afforded it, she would have been happy following in her grandmothers' (both of them) footsteps and had twice as many.

Of course, then I'd be twice as insane.

Posted by: Terry Oglesby at November 10, 2004 10:31 AM

Poignant. I loved being pregnant and, really, the only disappointment of our blessed lives is that we experienced it only once.

Posted by: Patricia at November 11, 2004 10:13 PM