I admit it. I'm anti-American -- cheese, that is. Some people from church gave us a bunch of processed cheese foods. The children liked them and my husband wasn't above spreading them on Wheat Thins and wolfing a few down, but one was more than enough for me. I love cheese -- real cheese, but that sort of stuff is just gross.

After I turned down the offer of processed spreadable cheese on a cracker, my husband declared my aversion to the stuff un-American and proclaimed me to be a cohort of Michael Moore and his ilk. I countered -- pointing out that one had only to look at Moore to see that he clearly was a fan of American cheese and other such foodstuffs, even if the rest of American culture leaves him cold.